I Am No One by Counterparts

Every f*****g day, I have to deal with the pressure I put on myself, to outdo myself. But I can’t ask for help, I can’t admit I’m weak. I’m going back on my words, I’m going back on who I used to be. I can’t take it anymore. Every day I wage a war on myself because I’d rather die than let this win over me. I can’t let this win over me. How can I be expected to help anyone else, when I can’t even help myself? Call me a hypocrite and I’ll be the first one to agree. I am no longer the prophet I once claimed to be. I’m stuck between trying to find where I stand, and what it is I stand for. I am no one.

Yo Check Me Out

I love Chinese food. I love food in general... I love screamo. I love action and violence. I have a sense of humor. I play videogames if not sleeping or going to school. I used to live in Saudi Arabia, although a lot of people apparently never believe me when I say it. My favorite TV show is Dexter NOT Dexter's Lab. I am a very laid back person. I think a lot about a lot of things. I really hate poetry. I hate sweaters. I really hate My Little Pony. My favorite game to play at the moment is either F.E.A.R. 3 or Nazi Zombies.

Optimist by Counterparts

I never asked for anyone to listen, and I never asked for anyone to take my words to heart. I’ve let myself become a target based on nothing more than expression. I will not lie to others, and I won’t lie to myself. If you’re searching for safety you can find it somewhere else, and I won’t mind. I’ve never seen myself as optimistic, so this should come as no surprise. No one feels good forever. Not even me. But this doesn’t give us an excuse to allow ourselves to become useless like the rest. We will turn our hatred into something to be proud of. We will make life worth living.

Alone

I'm an 18-year-old senior in high school living with my parents. I play videogames and sleep all day. There's two weeks left of school and I'm looking for summer jobs to apply for. I'm thinking of majoring in behavioral science when I go to college.

I wake up one morning to find my parents are gone, like they vanished into thin air. Then when I leave the house I come to realize that everyone else is gone. All that's left is traces of their clothes in their beds, as if it happened overnight. I then search for anyone else that could be alive.

It's been years. I've grown a beard and am traveling through California. Then I come across a woman. She's all by herself and she's a couple years younger than myself. I haven't interacted with another human for over 10 years.

What kind of person is this woman?

How will I react to this encounter?

How will she react?

What's gonna happen next?...

I Remember

I remember when I discovered how to talk in my head.

I remember when my Bendy Santa Clause toy broke.

I remember getting my first cut from my cupboard drawer.

I remember when I had my first crush.

I remember when I broke my cousin's bikini top while she was wearing it.

I remember when I got my arm stuck between the car door and the seat.

I remember when I would bring my toys to bed with me and wake up the next morning to find them gone, and my mom would just say: "Oh they just went on a vacation over to the neighbors house."

I remember when my two best friends in elementary school told me they both had a crush on me and how awesome and awkward it was.

Dialogue

Two men are driving in a car during the night time while it's raining and there's country music playing on the radio. The vast fields of the countryside pass by as they cruise into the night...

Man1-"I think we ran over something."
Man2-*snicker* "What makes you say that?"
Man1-"It smells really bad."
Man2-*sniff sniff* "Aw, you're right! Must have been just barely a second ago."
Man1-"Ugh. It's really bad..." *holds nose*
Man2-*cracks window* "Here we go."
Man1-"OH MY--! It's coming from outside, it smells so much worse!"
Man2-"S**t, yeah that's bad." *holds nose and rolls back up the window*
Man1-"Why on earth does it smell like that?! That's nothing I've ever smelt before."
Man2-"Whoa. What's that? What IS that?!"

Man2, the designated driver, suddenly comes to an urgent stop in the middle of the road. Both men step out of their car into the cold moist atmosphere of the light rain. What sat before them completely blocking off the road was a massive heap of what appeared to be mutilated corpses of people stacked up about two stories high. Man1 leans over to throw up his dinner all over the cold wet asphalt he stood upon as Man2 just stands there in awe at how big the pile of corpses was, the country music still playing in the background from the car's radio. How on earth did something like this come to be? And why did it happen?...

Poetic Tragedy by The Used

The cup is not half empty as pessimists say
as far as he sees nothing's left in the cup
A whole cup full of nothing for him to indulge
since the voice of ambition has long since been shut up

A singer, a writer,
he's not dreaming now of going nowhere
he gave heed to nothing
and all that he was is just a tragedy

So he voyages in circles succeeds getting nowhere
and submits to the substance that first got him there, there, there, there

then in violent, frustration
he cries out to God or just no one
is there a point to this madness
and all that he was is just a tragedy

He feels alone
His heart in his hands, he's alone
He feels alone
I feel

Then on that last day he breaks
and he stood tall
then he yelled, and he yelled
{why world, why world, hate you, hate you, bye world}

violent frustration
he cries out to God or just no one
is there a point to this madness
and all that he was is just a tragedy

127 Hours

I'm not really sure I have a favorite movie. It depends on the day I guess... But today I feel like my favorite movie would have to be 127 Hours, directed by Danny Boyle, my favorite director of all time. The reason I love this movie is because it portrays the emotions and feelings of the main character so well. That's the main reason why I love Danny Boyle's work. He just knows how to portray what the character in the film is feeling to the point where you actually feel a legit connection with the character. The way each scene is shot, the soundtrack which is almost always handmade specifically for that movie, and of course the acting. Danny Boyle is a master of movie-making. That's what I think.

Metal/Flesh

I know I'm human because I have fears. I'm not all hard metal and flashing lights. I don't make sparks when struck by a metal pole. I'm not precise. I hate numbers. I don't like being controlled by someone, I make my own decisions. I'm not okay with being alone all the time. Robots don't make squishy crunchy sounds when being run over by a car. Robots don't make mistakes.

Sleep

I go to a place where everything goes right. I go to a place where everything goes horribly wrong. Sleeping is a lot like gambling, it can be great but you HAVE NO IDEA what you're gonna get. It can be just as good as it can be bad. Sometimes sleep is the ultimate escape. Sometimes its a f****** prison. Because you can die without sleep. And sometimes its the last thing you want. Sleep, to me, can be the perfect medicine. But like any other medicine, it's dangerous. I really hate sleep...

Electric Bloom by Foals

This is a warning shot, your final call
An empty morgue with gurning hearts and hollowed crowns
And all I see is marching bands
Marching bands which never rest in broken stands
Butcher birds with useless throats
We're not safe of dying kings with plastic knives

It's just another hospital
It's just another, it's just another
It's just another hospital
It's just another, it's just another
It's just another hospital
It's just another hospital
It's just another hospital
It's just another, it's just another

Captains made with metal tags
Flags brought down of hollowed crowns
It's everything without a time
It's just a, it's just a

It's just another hospital
It's just another, it's just another
It's just another hospital
It's just another, it's just another

Goodbye all, your marching bands
Laid to rest in broken stands
Butcher birds will fly away (will fly away)
This is not a warning call, your final shot
All I see is butcher birds will fly away, electric bloom

It's just another hospital
It's just another, it's just another
It's just another hospital
It's just another, it's just another

Courage

Courage almost seems like a lost dream in this day and age, at least for those who don't already have it. There are just way too many things that people worry about when it comes to standing up for what you believe in. Like that girl who sits across from you in math class, and whether or not she'll think you're a moron if you speak up against something. Or that stupid little thing called pride that people like to wear on their chests, and whether or not they'll get a smudge on it if they decide to be generous and nice for a change. There's a list that goes on and on... But I'm obviously not going to write out that entire list. There's just too many things holding people back from obtaining that inner glow of courage. Not to say that no one has any though. And not to say that those who don't have it are pathetic. Courage, it seems like, is just a lot harder to come by nowadays.

Lif

Yeah. There's a letter missing in the title of this post. But that's okay... Cuz life really isn't complete until you're dead. So stop sweating over how much you want to have everything perfect, because your life isn't "complete" until it's over.

R.I.P. (Ode to a destroyed piece of artwork)

Here's a picture I painted last year. It's gone now though, because my mother decided to chuck it. I know! "WTF!!" right?? It's a pretty sick picture. At least I think so. I luckily managed to snap a picture of it during it's last days.

For the record...

NO. The letters "C.W." in my pen name have nothing to do with "Creative Writing". I figured I should state this because that would be absolutely stupid if that's what the letters stood for.

Oh. Here's some song lyrics to make this post a lil' more interesting.

The geek, with no beak: He's so weak he cannot speak! The geek, with no beak: He's so weak he cannot speak!
Vestigial wings And dwarven legs. A semper fi cranium That's got automatic eggs. His gaping maw Is geared to spew. He just might be a she So Birdette will do!!
Go eat your eggs! Force fed, force fed. Go eat your eggs! Out of his mouth- Straight at your head!!
With purple pants, (They start to tear) I reach out with all my might to Poke out an eye. I poke out an eye! I poke out an eye!
My seven year old smile: Vanishing! Eggs, Why eggs?! It's breaking my heart. It's hurting my nose. It's turning my skin green! Why did you have to be so mean?!
In my dreams I despise you More than you'll ever know. Even when I speak your name It makes me f*****g choke!
Throw it back! Throw it back! Throw it back! Throw it back!
Throw it back! Throw it back! Throw it back! Throw it back!

F.E.A.R.

I'm afraid of losing it. I'm afraid of being comfortable. I'm afraid of the color red. I'm afraid of empty space. I'm afraid of what I can't see. I'm afraid of what I can't hear. I'm afraid of happiness. I'm afraid of ignorance. I'm afraid of sleep. I'm afraid of waking up. I'm afraid of pain. I'm afraid of being numb. I'm afraid of making choices. I'm afraid of exposure. I'm afraid of addiction. I'm afraid of not being afraid.

*GADOOSH*

Anybody play Super Smash Bros?? I love that game. All three of them. I like the first and third one most though. My favorites to play as are Ike, Lucario, Ganondorf, Captain Falcon, Fox, and Wario. I love the guys that are slower but super powerful. One reason being is whenever I hit someone with Ike the sound portrayed through the title of this entry is heard. It's so satisfying to smash people with him and watch as they go soaring...

Manateen's Overall Master

You are such a character. You never admit you're wrong. You always falsely accuse me and the rest of humanity. You refuse to lose an argument. You almost completely hate your partner whom you've dedicated your life to, at least I THINK you dedicated your life to him. You two never really get along. You always argue about what's needed and what's wanted. Never do you two ever connect. Nothing is ever good enough. Sometimes I think that it's all your fault. Sometimes I blame you for everything wrong in my life. Sometimes I absolutely hate you to the core. But really.... That's only when I choose to ignore the other things. The GREAT things about you. Those things I tend to miss because I constantly shove them impatiently behind your negatives. Whenever I FINALLY step back, I see you're not all that bad. You always come back to loving me, even when I come home just to chew you out for grounding me because of my grades, even when I run off because I find you annoying on my bad days. You almost always buy me what I want whenever I want it, even though your partner totally rips on you for it. You're always there for me when I need someone to talk to. You always give me hugs when I come downstairs to greet you getting back from work. You always make sure I'm doing my best, even if it means you have to take away my TV or put me down so I can try and prove you wrong. You always do your best at your job. You always make sure I'm okay. You always love me. You ALWAYS love me. You're the best and don't let anyone tell you otherwise, even if it's me. Because I'm an idiot. And only at times like these do I know when I'm actually right about something in my life. Because the evidence is right there for me to see: You're the one who brought me here. You're the one who always picks me up off of the dirty floor. You're the one who always violently drags me to the finish. You're the one who stands strong for what you believe in. You're the one I look up to. You're the one who made it all possible. You're the one from whom I was torn... You are the one who I will always love.

Some pretty sweet tunes...

Just installed some music on to my blog. Ya'll should check it out if you're curious about my taste in music...

I love music. To me there is no better way to vent emotions than by blowing your brains out to your favorite song, album, or band. Nothing does the job quite like music does.

Ya'll don't do the math homework.

Haha! My friend and I came up with something reeeaaally stupid. It's a phrase as though it were quoted by some internet meme. "Ya'll don't do the math homework." It doesn't make any sense, and we say it a ton when we're around eachother. We're even making a retarded video which all it is is just me, him, and another kid saying the phrase while making some stupid motion with our bodies. It's so funny.... because it's so stupid.

I honestly think that the best friends you can have are the ones you can be stupid with and they don't care. Because "Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."

Dr. Seuss said that awesome quote. And MAN is it the truth.

What is love?

Love is a fire. It can do just as much bad as it can good. Love is a knife. It can be used to hurt people, and what seems shiny and useful may actually be more dangerous and harmful than you think. Love is a car. It can't work without a driver. Love is a dentist. It's very needed, useful, and even enjoyable when you're told what you want to hear, but very painful when you're told something you're not expecting. Love is cake. It's so sweet but you can only have so much of it, too much of it can be unhealthy.

Intro something er other...

Cool stuff. I've never made a blog before. Meh...

Well let's see here... I love food. There is nothin' quite like a- good meal. I also love music. Videogames are pretty sweet. The color green, I think, is quite superb. Aaaaand... Bacon. Bacon kinda goes along with food of course, but it's probably one of my favorites. At least at the moment it is...

Oh yeah. So about my Pen Name... I was inspired to make it what it is because it's related to one of the songs my favorite band made. But I wouldn't wanna tell you the name of that band. Cuz that could be too much information... But I love that band sooo much. That is all I will tell you about that band. Cuz they're just so good. Ha.